home

I have this great idea for this epic song, or epic album maybe, but I've been thinking about it and have decided to hold off on writing any of it until I'm a little better on the guitar and more importantly have traveled a bit. if the whole buying a month train pass and just traveling thing works out that would be ideal because i want to explore the concept of home as that's something I've really been wrestling with. I'm not really sure anymore where my home is and it's really confusing because in one sense my home is in Burnaby where I grew up and family is, but then in some capacities that has stopped feeling like home and Ft. Langley and trinity has replaced that and that feels a lot like home, but there's also a big hunk of me up in Kelowna and i might even move up there if I can find a good job up there so I'm really confused as to which place is my real home. and then to complicate matters, it seems like none of those are really home and what if home isn't so much a physical place, but it's to do with the people I'm with. Also, even more frightening than this is the concept that I could actually have no home or I may never find where my home is. today however, as I was biking back to my house I had this sudden revelation. of course none of these places feel fully like home because none of them are my home. not even the road is my home or even in the company of friends. my home isn't even in this world, but in heaven. to use a Platonic and Augustinian language, I have a piece of eternity in me and i will never be fully satisfied until I am returned to eternity, making eternity is my home. so I think I'd like to write a whole album of songs exploring the concept of home and bring it round to this with the final song and make the whole thing fit together. however (although I sometimes don't) writers should write from their own experiences (or at least it makes writing much better) and I should like to at least look all over North America and see if I can find a home down here or find out what home is before I come to a conclusion... I can't just come to that conclusion with my mind. I have to actually physically discover it. writing should be done the hard way. that's all, except that I'm working on an awesome song, but I've got writers block. the other week nothing could really stop me, but this week I'm having a lot more difficulty (which is a good thing). peace, love, and good vibes.

pipe smoking professor